Monday, January 30, 2012

Testing Friendship

I was feeling extremely shitty yesterday so I didn't put up a post; I actually thought I had gotten malaria but I'm feeling better now. Also, the heat around here was oppressive. There was no escape! It was so hot that even drinking cold water wasn't helping. Of course with the heat comes dust because most of the roads here are just murram; my shoes can't stay clean longer than 30 seconds.:(

Enough about my weather woes and on to today's post. It won't be a long post because I really don't have much to say. I think I may be about to get into one of my broody moods. When I get into those, I spend hours on my own thinking about whatever it was that got me in that mood. It can't be very healthy because usually the conclusions I come to are depressing.

Like this mood that's been hanging over me is about friendship. I've been contemplating about the people I call my friends and whether the sacrifices I'd make for them would be reciprocated. And how would you test it? How would you know? At what point do you call someone a friend? If you have to test it then it isn't truly a friendship because you don't trust them, is it?

I once read somewhere that you can count as friends those people you can call past midnight when in trouble and they'll get out of bed to help. I think that it's a very solid test, don't you? I've only ever been in such a situation once, of course. I had just dropped another friend of mine at her room after an extremely rowdy session of drinking in my room. I was drunk and on a whim called another friend of mine who lived in a nearby building. It must have been 12.30am. She came and kept me company in the cold for almost two hours mostly listening to me (I'm talkative when drunk). Yeah, she's a true friend.

So how do you decide who you call a friend? At which point, for you, does someone move from acquaintance to friend? Let me know in the comments or by email. Peace!!!

6 comments:

  1. That's a very interesting question. I guess that it depends on what friendship means to you. People I call my friends are basically people I like spending time with so much that if I don't see them or communicate with them for a while, I miss them. Anyone I like interacting with but pretty much forget about if they're not around is an acquaintance.

    Now, above "friends" I have "close friends" who are people I trust and have told very personal things about my life. I think they are the people I'd get out of bed for if they needed help. Not sure I'd call them if I needed help though. I don't like asking for help, that's my big problem.

    The other problem is that I doubt they could call me if they were in trouble past midnight, because my phone is off at night - I need my sleep!

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  2. You always seem to have your life so well defined!! How do you do that? How did you reach that point?
    I have friends people I enjoy talking to and hanging around with. These are people who I may not talk to in a long while and then miss but not necessarily call but they remain on my mind.
    Then I have best friends, people who know me a little too well, the one's I try not let major decisions and things happen without talking. If I miss any of these I immediately try to get in touch with them, it doesn't matter that where they are. These are the people I *know* would come to my rescue at anytime.
    Sleeping with your phone off is a good idea if it's always pinging with alerts. I don't get those much but I do play a lot with it in bed...perhaps I should also consider switching it off:)

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  3. I don't know... I guess I have a very organised mind? I'm a trained librarian/information manager, after alll :-D

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  4. Nice!! I sometimes wish I was just as organised, as sure of what I think as you... I sometimes feel like I'm still trying to find myself

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  5. Well, I'm also older than you are :-) But I'm still trying to find myself in some ways, and there are things I was sure of in the past that I eventually ended up changing my mind about. Nothing is ever really certain in life, I think :-)

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  6. There you go again!! Something so profound. I've got a lot of growing to do

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